Tuesday, August 12, 2008
How I Survived a Divorce at 24 with 2 Kids!
Whelp, I was a 24 year old mom to my 2 1/2 year old daughter and my three week old son when my ex-husband walked out on us...He decided he did not want to be married anymore and couldn't take (in picture: kiersten almost 3 and preston at 5 months)
being a full time father...So it was just the three of us...the kids and I...no job...cause I was a stay at home mom at the time....and no money.....just the house he left us in...but he kicked us out 7 months later and sold our home....So how did we survive? One day at a time....it was tuff....I stayed in the home for that 7 months before he sold it... made him pay the payments on all the bills...mortgage, electric, phone....I got Wic for my kids and I ate very little food...I decided that I better lose weight anyhow since I had a gained a ton during my second pregnancy....so I turned vegetarian...which of course helped on the food bill....and btw it works...I lost all of my pregnancy weight gain.....
So anyhow ...luckily my three week old did not have colic like my daughter had at that age, or I prolly would have lost my mind....I took a night class on computers while my mother watched my kids thankfully....and when my ex made the kids and I move out of the house he was paying for, I did like a lot of single moms do... I moved in with my mother for sometime....After finding a job and getting the kids into daycare I finally saved up enough money to move into our own
(in picture: me, kiersten and preston in 2004)
apartment...I worked full time and then picked the kids up from daycare for a full night...living as cheaply as we could in a not so great place..but it was enough for us...When I went through hard times like trying to pay for heating gas.... I was one of the lucky ones and was able to ask my parents for help and support...without them I really don't know where we would be today....It takes a lot of love, hard work and remembering
that you can do this by yourself...when you are a single parent you can feel lost at times...but remembering that your children are worth every minute of the struggles is what keeps you going...believe me I did not think I would be where I am at today....I dated allot of course while my kids were young I remember thinking good grief I will never meet anyone....but I did 7 years later...My hubby Terry is a wonderful man...he is loving and supporting..even when I decided to home school my oldest..he said go for it...he wanted me to stay at home and raise our children...which of course I was very happy to do...it's what I have wanted all along....so to all of you single mom's out there don't give up on what you want...make it happen.....get rid of the pride and use social services if you need to and don't be shy about asking for help...weather it be needing someone to babysit for you or to take your child to school for you when you are sick...and if it is a man you want and you feel he is never going to come....don't worry about .....go on with life you don't need a man to live..I promise...and one day when you are not even thinking about a man or if he will ever show up.... he might just show up on your computer screen like mine did... :)
On the family side: Both of my older kids are home from camp now and my niece is here for the week...we have been studying space so far this week with the homeschooling we visited the Planaterium on Sunday and last night we broke out the old telescope to look at the moon..very cool...we stayed up till early this morning trying to catch some meteors from the shower that is going on this week...but it was not that great of a show...so we all went to bed...we are going to check it out again tonight just in case it is any better..but I doubt it....I am also taking the kids on a field trip tomorrow to a space museum...that ought to be fun...I am taking all five by myself...I will let you know how it goes..lol....my son Tristan is right in love with his cousin and cuddles up to her while watching TV at night...and my youngest son is getting over his ear infection but is having nasty diapers because of the meds...yuck......And last but not least this Friday my youngest step sister is getting married.....cannot wait to see the wedding....I know she is going to be a beautiful bride....okay, well that is it for now.....